Why some Black women only date White Men

Posted by James, 17 Jan

We always talk about Black women and how they can’t date White men. Well, there are those black women that only date White men. I remember a pal of mine telling me once that she will never get married to Black man. And even as kids, when playing make believe, she was always married to a White guy.

The reason for women like her who only date white men may be very similar to the reasons why most Black women only date Black men … attraction. Some also feel that Black men treat them better than any other man ever could, and they feel that they'd rather have what they know instead of experimenting with what they don’t know.

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Some Black women are just not physically attracted to Black men. And as much as parents usually like hooking us up with people of our own race, well it reaches a time when you have to be honest with yourself. Imagine my pal for example: As a child, her first crush was Adam Sandler, then as she got older, she fell in love with Mel Gibson. This doesn’t mean that Black men aren’t handsome – they are just not her type.

Some also feel that White men (not ALL but many) find black women to be remarkable in every sense of the word; hence Black women tend to gravitate towards those affections. Much as her husband treats her better than any man ever had, one lady admits that she has been with some White men that disgusted her with their behaviors. But she says that generally, older White men and very mature on a broader level than with Black men on many levels.

Some are just wildly turned on by the differences … skin color, hair, being raised in different cultures, music, foods … the list is endless. Its all about the desire for the mysterious and unknown. And for some, its just pure love because there are those that forget that we are ‘black’ and ‘white’ and just coincidentally happened to fall in love with a White guys.

One thing we all have to remember is that not every White man is a Black woman’s dream. It all depends on the individual … good and bad comes in all colors.

With that said, the generic phrase - ‘It should be about love and not color’ – is cute. But in this case, not entirely truthful. Its not only about love. Much as love gets cultivated eventually, there is physical attraction and a declaration to date only one race. Racist or preference?

1841 responses to "Why some Black women only date White Men"

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  1.   DJTEEL says:
    Posted: 13 Oct 08

    In my first post i was 'typing'from experiences i'd had in the past.it would be absurd,however to believe that ALL black women are the kind that i typed about in that post.for as many times as i've seen disciplined whites, asians,etc , i've encountered just as often, very atractive black women in public that are quiet,demure and alongside very disciplined children.it would be ridiculous to blanket statement black women into any certain type of corner just as much as it would be to do so to ANY race of people or either gender. .i know what i meant in my eralier posts and screw those who attempt at translating my statements into something that THEY believe i meant/ ***** i tried to point out at one point too,how since my feelings about today's popular black music is something i loathe(rap ,hip hop and r&b)..noise..makes me wanna tear my ears off/.it was difficult as she found my music(very hard rock and metal,thrash music) to be annoying to a huge degree.when i think of how i feel about todays rap,hip hop and r&b,i remember how my parents(now in their 80's and 90's)hated rock music when i was young.to them it was noise and they had an intense dislike of it. this girl and i had total differences in interests and we felt very strongly about our own musical interests especially as music was 90% of our pass time when not involved in our jobs.allot of the music i listen to would equate to some calling it satanic,being that the softest stuff i listen to is ozzy osbourne and black sabbath.the hardest being nefalim.i actually,imo,1rockgoddess,you are totally awesome attractive.that really is your pic in your posts right??

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  2.   Member says:
    Posted: 13 Oct 08

    Listen Rockgodess DJTEEL said his statements and he has to live with them. So stop trying to stick of for him simply because he his white. Apparently you do not care about his negative statements towards black women. Instead you took an opportunity to criticize me. How about showing a backbone and directly addressing DJTEEL. Good day

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  3.   1rockgodess says:
    Posted: 13 Oct 08

    Now whats going on? DJTEEL never said he likes b/w. He is still saying the same thing. "he is not into b/w but doesnt hate them" what is there to be angry about or be unforgiving about. The main person I blame is himself for spitting out his first comment on this blog where everything one says is to be miscontrued. Where were we again? DJTEEL aint a subject, the major reason we are here is to give logical reasons on why some black women are into w/m. PLEASE CAN SOMEBODY TELL ME? Topics like this do spark up my curioustiy and plzzz Mr queens no poisonous statements...I've heard enough!

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  4.   luvanurse says:
    Posted: 12 Oct 08

    THe whole black race black men and black women is too forgiving to everyone else but each other.

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  5.   luvanurse says:
    Posted: 12 Oct 08

    THe whole black race is too forgiving to everyone else but each other.

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  6.   Member says:
    Posted: 12 Oct 08

    Now DJTEEL wants to 'clarify himself" on why he is not interested in black women. Sounds like crap to me, he just dug himself in a deeper hole than he was in before. Perhaps sellout black women want to believe him because he "could have not wanted to be with a black woman". He just wants to save "face" and backtrack on his statements, which is understandable. I may disagree with "Tampa Chris", but he has never fed me bullshit like this DJTEEL guy. At least Tampa Chris has "integrity" and if the Alphas are down with him that is good enough for me. The sellout black woman's Achilles heel is being to forgiving. Ultimately that is their downfall. Good day to everyone

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  7.   1rockgodess says:
    Posted: 11 Oct 08

    Thanks for clarifying yourself DJTEEL. Everyone cannot be the same and we understand that, besides who would force you to do therwise? That is your personal opinion and feeling which we recognise as banal. Yes there are conservative people and the avant-garde people. Stick to whats best for you, the bottomline is, are you happy? It's not every white man that is for a black woman neither is it every black woman that is for a white man. The main thing I object to is people saying IR r/ships are not suppose to be and making nasty side comments. What can I say we all have our preferences and if we are happy with our choices what more do we need? be genuine to yourself. There's only 1rockgodess.

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  8.   DJTEEL says:
    Posted: 11 Oct 08

    1.I NEVER SAID I DISLIKED BLACK PEOPLE. 2.I NEVER SAID I SEE ANYTHING WRONG WITH INTERRACIAL DATING. 3.WHITE BLACK ASIAN,HISPANIC,ETC..WE'RE ALL EQUAL AS HUMAN BEINGS IN ALLWAYS. all i said to be called a nazi here is that interracial dating isn't for me.as i said,i grew up with white folk and have always hung with and had white friends.it's a comfort zone i suppose ,but alot of people are this way as a lot of people hang only with others of their own race..it doesn't make someone racist.normal people would understand exactly what i'm meaning without calling me racist.my preference is to date within my own race but i don't have bad intent or feelings toward people due to the color of their skin.some of oyu people make me out to be some kind of racist i guess for the reason i don't leave my self open to interracial dating. i see nothing wrong with it if that is someone's preference.it's not an issue that can be held against someone simply because they're not open to it themselves personally.the world is full of blacks that only hang with and date blacks and hispanics that hang with and only date other hispanics and so on..that doesn't mean that they hate or dislike others people of other races. i'm not a nzi 'nor am i a racist.i have to wonder how in the world someone who reads what i'm saying interpets it as racism/.

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  9.   1rockgodess says:
    Posted: 10 Oct 08

    Where are the lovers?.. forget the haters/opposers who want to take pain relievers for what is suppose to be your headache! phew!!!!!! its a pitiful thing to live in such grief pretending beat and going out of your way to aggravate people thereby causing a social nuisance...(now thats some serious issue someone's got) how long would this harsh emptiness countinue? cause truely their loads of word and empty cause I could never see how a mind like that works in the 21st century... ;)

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  10.   dimplessss says:
    Posted: 10 Oct 08

    It's been a minute since I was last here and I must say, the last few posts have been interesting and enlightening to say the least. To Tampa Chris, Skee-Phi Frat!! I wish I'd have known, the Alphas had a HUGE convention here back in July, I'd have told you about it. Dimplessss

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  11.   Tampa_Chris says:
    Posted: 09 Oct 08

    In closing, I will have to agree with a lot of your latest post. I think you bring up many good points, just sometimes say things to erupt disucussion in a devils advocate role wether you agree or not. I do agree that me being white allows privileges beyond that of the black community and I would never argue that, only work hard to utilize these privileges to impact the movement. That white man who "rides off Black men" and is a poser, and the whole nine is out there I'm most sure. But rest assured it is not within all of us and that is what I hope you will take from this. And my child, if she/he is bi-racial, will embody both races and she/he will with be well educated on how to be a strong woman/man proud of both her backgrounds. Anyway, I've grown tired of this conversation cuz again, no matter what it will happen regardless of what anyone says. This is only one White man in one of the many hundreds of interracial dating sites amongst the thousands upon thousands of beautiful Black women that know whats up and have love for catz like me. And no, I did not tell Frat nor the masonry I was Native American or Hispanic. True, the Devine Nine is historically African-American, but that only tells you how true I am because, well, if you know than you'd just know. I am proud of my cultural background and would never say I am something I am not. If you had any remote idea of what I've been through to get to where I have to be right now (not saying you don't) then you would truly know I am no poser, traitor, or any other term you may use about White guys. And you best believe I have a line of brothers, strong Black men, that would die for me as I would of them. Blessed day rather than good day

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  12.   Member says:
    Posted: 09 Oct 08

    Tampa Chris I respect guys in the Alpha fraternity. That is why you have an interesting perspective from being a white guy and understanding how some black men feel. You made good points and I should broaden my horizons as far as having more "White friends." I would not say it is because of pride. It is more like what do we have in common. Your different in the sense I figure most of your friends is black males. You want to distinguish yourself from "the typical white male." I do not think all white men live a "good lifestyle" and always had things easy for them. But you will never experience the same things black men go through. Your white skin affords you the privilege to be looked at differently. You mention the "new generation", that I am an "old timer". I think you must a black man in white white skin because I am 30-years-old LOL. I may have an old school way of thinking but you will see the past often comes back to haunt people when "things get rough." The economy is going downhill, people are becoming more polarized. The reason I mention the economy and politics is because when times get tough we always go back to our "true nature." Seems like your multicultural "generation" thinks dismissing race will make it go away. Yes we have made progress in the country. We have also had setbacks also. My patience grows thin for those who "ride off black men" to get in the good graces of black women. You mention interracial dating will continue on regardless of what I say. This is the problem, if your a white male having a child with a black woman that child is "Black". Someone is going to say "na they are biracial"! No! they are black period end of story! It seems the speed bump in society might be you because "the pure Aryan white male" is becoming less in numbers. Since you seem to agree with this scenario and I am indifferent to it. That simply means their will be more black women just different shades regardless if their parent is white. I guess interracial dating is not bad after all. If you were to put it in that context. The White race "traitor" has always been a friend to the black man. Good day By the way how the hell you became an Alpha Chris? You told them you part "Native American or Hispanic." Amazing

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  13.   Tampa_Chris says:
    Posted: 09 Oct 08

    Well Mr. Queens, You have answered my question of why you have such a narrow perspective on white males. You simply don't have any as close personal friends, and quite frankly, I think your pride won't allow you to and thats too bad. You might be nice to my face in a social setting but never chill back and kick it. I'm a chill cat and I don't think that alllllll the black friends that are extremely close to me are going behind my back and saying, I'm trying to "be down." I don't think I'd be a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity if they wouldn't have rooted me out as a poser. Rather, they are part of my generation which, yes, you are too old to understand. In this civil rights movement of only about 50 years of progress vs thousands of slavery, your 6 year difference from mine equals to double of the positive change that you've failed to experience first hand. Throughout the negative (i.e. locking doors, etc.) there's been extreme amounts of positive change that many fail to see b/c the microwave age in which your generation was at the forefront of want things to change in a snap. Patience is truly a virtue my friend. And I am militant in the fact that I would die for a cause, for my brothers, and my family if it came down to it. Martin in fact that I look into patience, love, and the good of people before resorting to violence. I didn't grow up in a all white picket fence suburb and my daddy wasn't Mike Brady to say the least. And I havn't dated many "chubby black girls" just by chance, but I certainly have dated sistas from the hood and in corporate lifestyles. You best believe that. True, many of these white men, esp. in the movies, are dating black professionals, but again, NOT ALL WHITE PEOPLE ARE THE SAME. And I have also dated a couple black women that had kids, but do to my age, not that many. If I like her then I like her. Having children is a part of life. So where is your bottom line now? I wonder, Mr. Queens, if you are an intellect for the purpose of gaining new knowledge and broadening your mind, or simply looking for new ammunition to combat other peoples ideals? Let me try one of your approaches here and see what you think b/c if you can do it, hey, anyone can... White men do in fact support these strong Black women men like you disgrace and write off and rather than just "get over on them" marry them, believe in them, treat them like Queens, and help the evolution of the unity of humanity. Its going to happen from this day till the end of days and guess what, in much much larger numbers. Deal with it. Mr. Queens you are merely a speed bump in our society and you may be 30 years old, but you have a 1960's personality.

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  14.   Member says:
    Posted: 09 Oct 08

    Dear Tampa Chris She is right, the lovely young lady "Swtgurl" said " I don't get it". I am aware you have participated in black organizations Tampa Chris. You asked me where my facts were. Well you can look at the statistics on blacks and whites and see if we have truly decided to integrate. I am also aware you are in academia, I studied sociology too. Now if you are going to tell me that racial groups are "hanging out together" then you are wrong. If you look exclusively at your own friendships that does not represent the whole society. I thought you knew this Tampa Chris. I saw you may have lost your temper with that "pissed of black guys" comment. It is unlike you Tampa Chris to "generalize" like me. You tend to prove my theory, more than "disprove it." You said I am a "hater", I disagree how can hate anything when my skin color is black. I face hate everyday when a person locks their car door when I pass by. That is the reality I live in. You claim I am a bystander, you look the black community as "victims." You got a false perception about me, Rev Calvin Butts was the President of my college. I think he is the only black man in the SUNY College system to run a college for some many years. Secondly Oliver McCall the former NYC Controller spoke at my graduation. I think he was the first African American to be the controller of New York City. Al Sharpton has spoke at my school several times. Let me tell you something those black organizations fail to tell you. There are African Americans that do well in certain communities. Maryland, NY, Georgia, Florida and etc. I pulled myself up out my neighborhood South Jamaica Queens and became something. I do not have an obligation to help anybody else. Nobody ever says to a white person "Hey man go help your white trash homeys in the hood." No that does not happen, so do not give me that argument about your participation in black organizations. I applaud you for even "trying" to do something. Your one of the few white guys that I do respect considering I have no white male friends. I am well aware that you have studied the Civil Rights movement. The Martin Luther King statement was my "own" opinion. The books about it are more accurate because I do not have a PhD. You said you have a Malcom X militancy, that is interesting militancy on what exactly? What are you "militant" about Tampa Chris? I am 30 and I considered an "Old Man". My brother is 25 and Tampa Chris I look at you like my younger brother. You do have good points but your idealism is going to be "tested". I am not even "pro" black Tampa Chris. I think niggas do each other in more than a white person will ever do. I am a street dude that happened to get a college education. White people, other than my own family, has done more for me than black people have done. My issue is with interracial dating. You white boys are wrong for what your doing. You will not date a chubby black girl, a black girl in the hood. You will not date a black girl that has children. That the bottom line and I do! Black men like me that support these black women, your just trying to get over on them! Good day

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  15.   Swtgurl190 says:
    Posted: 09 Oct 08

    Oh my goodness, you guys are unbelievably patient! Give it up already because clearly he does not get it. I do love to read your very intelligent and thoughtful comebacks though, really makes me smile :-)

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  16.   Tampa_Chris says:
    Posted: 08 Oct 08

    Fair response but, Where is your facts behind your "truth?" I know you're more intelligent than to make something out to be actual truth that would definitely be seen to everyone else, except except pissed off Black guys, to be cultural angst. I like our discussions on here, but you kinda seem like a Hater. I'm a man. I would never hate on another man gettin' the girl. No matter what color. And if a White girl dates a Black guy, awesome, hope they're happy. What's the next issue in life that actually deserves my time or concern? And I would not say that we're all holding hands. Far from it wherever you live, but I will say I work with many open-minded individuals from all cultures and it does give hope. The same hope that has a Black man a month away from being our possible leader. And he's leading in the poles!!! Thats aaaaa lot of Black and White people that believe in unity, and then some on the other side that may not, or simply they do, but just don't like Obama as a politician. To each is own I guess. You're an older gentlemen so I don't think you would be able to relate with my/this college-age uprising for change. I think you have the old school mentality of cautiousness, which is understandable, but, well, old-school. A lot has changed since your days in school. You probably just fell to every day commonality and complacency. Your mind hasn't been challenged in many years on a cultural level outside of the monotony of working 9 to 5 and finding time to go out and make to make your opinions or "truths." The reality is our generation has and continues to. I thank the Blacks and Whites that paved the way for such opportunities to happen. You see, though I will not go wit for wit with Civil Rights facts, I do indeed consider myself quite knowledgeable on the topic seeing that I studied it for most of my college/adult life. As well as the fact that through my work in the NAACP and Diversity Fellowship deep in the heart of the Black community and culture to this day I also feel my opinion would be considered. An opinion, but an educated one. You don't get to me, but I feel it is resentful that you have in a discussion with an individual that has put himself on the line for the Black community and the cause and you'd just write me off as trying to be Black??? How inconsiderate. I'd be willing to put my continuing work in the movement against most. And never to rub it in anyone's face, but rather to let others gauge the fact that people are truly different in ways more than bad and hateful. You see Mr. Queens, in trying times I know I am a soldier doing work and making change and would die for my cause. A Martin mindset with a Malcolm militance. You seem like you may be a by-stander watching along such as many of the Black community Malcolm called out in his speech "The Ballot or the Bullet." See, its not fun when people are just assumed in a position. I'm sure you are a very proud Black man judging by your quick trigger of the word sell-out. I am an individual and don't think like everyone else. I would go crazy if I had a negative mentality like that of another. And frankly calling out anyone is negative, and I just simply am not leading with the words of my mother at age 10, "If you don't have anything good to say, then just don't say it." There is a deep mentality of a greater people that will eventually flush out the negative. As one has commented recently, "Everyone will be a shade of brown in a few hundred years and all this talk will be redundant."

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  17.   doodlebug44 says:
    Posted: 08 Oct 08

    Mr. Queens, I have heard it all now. "I call black woman who date white men sellouts". That is fine, but "That happens to be the truth". Not That is your opinion not the truth. Scott

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  18.   Member says:
    Posted: 08 Oct 08

    Dear Tampa Chris I call black women who date white men "sellouts". That happens to be the truth. It may have a negative connotation to it but I use those words for a reason. It does inflame the argument when I use those "kinds of words" I understand that. Just like the race traitor comment might have been harsh. The race traitor comment had to be used because "other people" would feel that way that was not black. They would call Tampa Chris a race traitor. I try to bring a harsh reality to this subject because it needs to be talked about. I agree the black women on this board is very intelligent or the debate would not have raged on this long. I like was Tatt had to say and I often go home and think about what people say here. Depending if I am bored or got time on my hands. You make a point about this "board" as far as black women saying they would date "all men". That is a true statement and I would disagree with you. Perhaps if the spotlight was not on them they would feel differently. Now Tampa you are in academia, the racial unity thing is "garbage". You live in Florida and your going to tell me everybody is holding hands. Let's even go with your theory that I am pessimistic. Then you would have to argue that you have never had any "racial stereotypes" in your head ever in your life. If you say you did not then I think your lying. Martin Luther King Jr never wanted no unity. He said that to get the black middle class their fair rights in this country. It was a "Black middle class" movement. If it was not for extremists like "Malcom X" who were not "middle class", legislation would have not been done during Martin Luther King Jr's era. Martin Luther King's father was a well off preacher that sent his son to the best "Black College" in Atlanta. I will not go on about that. As for a black guy that cannot "catch a break", I finished college with a good G.P.A. I have a good job, I don't know how that applies to me concerning this topic. It seems like your threatened by black men like me that see through hypocrites. You want to be with black women but no nothing about "Black culture". You want to be with black women but no nothing about "The Civil Rights movement". In conclusion No white man ever took a black woman from me. More like the other way around. As for my girlfriend she "hardly sees me", I am always busy. Perhaps I should spend time with her. Maybe this weekend. Good day

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  19.   Tampa_Chris says:
    Posted: 08 Oct 08

    Mr Laurelton Queens, I would hope you would then agree with your previous statement in regards to these women on this blog. You keep trying to define this "sellout black woman" if there is such a thing other than a Black woman saying, "I wish I were White." I don't think any of these women would be saying that as they seem like Strong Intelligent Women, Black, White, or other. One of your repetitive points is the Black women's constant barrage of down-grading the Black man and how women are dating all these white men because they've given up on Black men in a sense for various reasons. If we look back on most of these women including the ones primarily in these discussions they have openly expressed their love for all men and agree that there are good Black men out there as well as White men, etc. I think they're just hating on you no matter what color you are. It just so happens you're Black and you know how to push their buttons in a very easy forum, i.e. an interracial dating site. It just seems that in many of your posts you're trying to call out these women on here as sell-outs, and if not directly certainly indirectly (ladies do you agree?) You would have to admit that these women are bringing up extremely intelligent and interesting points and its not any bias on this side because i'm White. And don't get me wrong I have seen a lot of good points on your side too. But it's not like these women are out on just a random site screeming "I only date White guys!" or "I hate Black men!" They're simply on a site that they can relate with. You found us. These are professionals, Mother's, Daughters, Sisters, and beyond all (no matter what you may think they are), Strong Black women. Have a lil more respect as you came from that same woman. The same reason why I am not a "traitor" because, one, I do date White women, and two, my Mother and Sister are White and are my World along with the rest of the ladies in my family. I would expect a stronger argument from you, especially after reading my posts, than these generalizations of a White male. We're not all nerdy, corporate office, no swagger havin', got my Black girl to make a point, "Black Talkin'", insecure, trying to be Black, catz that you may have come in contact with or lost an ex-girlfriend to. To me, more so, it is beautiful that different people are able to open themselves up and work toward this racial unity that you simply write off as "garbage." That seems very pessimistic of you and I feel bad if that's the outlook you have in life. The mentalities of all the good people on these sites are the reason that there isn't segregation laws anymore. You should be thankful of these women and men who outreach in the hopes of understanding. I don't think Martin Luther King would think that's "garbage" as he died in his hopes for such a Unity. And also if you really think God would say, "Um, Chris, you dated a Black girl. You did everything right except that so you're going to Hell." I don't think so. It's gonna happen all over these UNITED States wether you like it or not. I don't know you, but you are more and more coming off as the Black guy who can't catch a break b/c of the White man, or the System, or whatever it is you have angst towards at that moment. Who claims that every White guy that is around the Black community if frontin' and as you say it, playing the Eminem card. My brother, (which I call you b/c we're all men under God), I think you have many issues that seem to stem from some sistas and White women that played you. I would think a strong Black man whose happily married wouldn't waste his time on an interracial dating site dissin' these women. Uh oh I said "diss" Is that okay??? In dissssssbelief, Chris

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  20.   Member says:
    Posted: 08 Oct 08

    I read all the commentary. Please excuse me I am eating a sandwich while I am on my lunch break talking to you people. You made several references to "opposition", I really do not know why people feel that their the victims against people "hating on them". Not to long ago you could not even date outside your race "legally' in the United States. Now it is acceptable which is fine but the whole reason behind it can be argued. Somebody said about past scars from childhood. Yea sort of like the sellout black women that claim "black men did them wrong" so their going to white men. I think you forgot to mention that. The fact you feel you should limit my speeches is because "more people are going to feel like me" is insulting to people that have their own opinion. I cannot make you hate interracial relationships. I cannot make you agree with it either. I just express my opinion from my experiences and the people around me. I doubt "human teasing" was derogatory names said to each other over face. I do not consider that teasing. You all jumped on DJTEEL when he said he wouldn't date a black girl because she likes R&B and he likes country music. The people on here damn near crucified him. They called him a nazi, once again their is no affirmative action in dating. As for the comment of misery loving company. Some of the most miserable people I have met have been sellout black women. They can have "it all" with a white man and still want to stick their fat nose into what black men are doing. White men do not even do that. They don't sit there and wonder what the white girls are doing if their in an interracial relationship with a black woman. You need to wonder why your head is in the sand. Peace and Blessings Mr Laurelton Queens

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  21. Posted: 08 Oct 08

    why does he always tease us with that "I'm gone" tagline.... ..LOL... The opposition to "interracial dating" might not disappear right away... but if we are to move on/forward to even get close to any sort of REAL racial unity the propaganda MUST CEASE. If we sit back and accept the insults we are passively letting that "opposition" grow....it will be seen as "O.K." and therefore more will continue to do it...(like Chris said "opposing" something that really has nothing to do with you is NOT in line with reality) What is REALLY funny is that, sort of like what Andy said, not too far into the future even the word "interracial" will probably be archaic and obsolete. It's just sad because when that happens many people will lose their "purpose" in life....not having anyone to ridicule or look down on any more (ok ...I KNOW that is fantastical....HUMANS WILL ALWAYS FIND SOMETHING TO TEASE ONE ANOTHER ABOUT...lol). They certainly will have to find themselves new hobbies at the very least. It's also sad that it is apparent that most of the "opposition" has it's own self-hate issues to deal with and a lot of childhood "scars" that refuse to heal. They will NEVER be happy until others are just as miserable as them so of course anyone that is truly HAPPY is NOT REAL to them. When some speak of the "opposition" it seems like they are loving the fact that there simply is ("always going to be") "opposition".....makes ya wonder. Peace and Blessings tatted2death

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  22.   Member says:
    Posted: 08 Oct 08

    I want to address all three of you. Tampa Chris, Tatt and Rockgoddess. The implication that I do not "live in the real world" is a joke. I actually do, and you three "choose not to'. I have lived in Florida and people stayed in their own "racial group" for the most part. Certain "places" in Florida you cannot even venture into! So save me the holding hands "racial unity" garbage. New York is the same way, where I currently reside. As for my comments about dark skin women. My last two girlfriends were dark skin. Sellout black women like to say black men are only into "light skin women". See that is the fundamental difference between sellout black women and traitor white men that abandon their white women. They like to attack their own race and think there is something "noble" about that. Everyone harbors some type of "racial opinions" If they say they do not, their lying. As for the "UK" Black girl, this is the thing. People get upset at my statements. As if I did not do the insults that opposition to interracial dating would "just disappear." You attacked black men for dating white women. White men attack black men for dating white women. Now you want people to have sympathy for you both because they are "picking on you." Well I have no sympathy for none of you. Especially sellout black women who "out of their way" to attack black men. Even the black men that do not "date outside their race". I am 30 years-old, I grew up in the 80s when it was acceptable that white boys use to bully black men. Then Hip Hop came (Mc Hammer) era and then they started "moving away" from urban neighborhoods. They so called "White Flight", when the tables turned and black males were in gangs. They avoided black males like the plague just like they currently do now. If anybody going to pack their bags it will not be black men that is for sure. You take your sellout black girlfriend to your white suburbs and keep her their. I do not care if dress like Eminem trying to "fit in." I am gone Good day

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  23. Posted: 08 Oct 08

    so true (or something like it...LOL), Andy....I like how your mind works To Tampa Chris....I continue to be a fan of your posts; NOT simply because you are a white (light-skinned...lol) male but because you seem to, without fail, inject some common sense into this "controversial" (tired) subject. I agree that it is awfully unfair that some on here choose to lump all white men together yet they want to be seen as "separate" from the stereotypical black male. Are they ONLY "exceptions"???? Or should the whole tired stereotyping method be ousted as a viable means of judging someone??? Doesn't take a Phd holder to see the answer there. hey Chris, if I am ever in Florida again I might have to take you up on that offer...LOL. (I like the new pic/look, btw.) Peace and Blessings tatted2death P.S. As for the whole bi-racial/light-skinned woman thing (Natanya's comment). I think this is a myth. Many times I have been subject to dating a black guy that (openly) is either "coming back" from dating a bunch of white women or is "on his way" to dating white and other women.....I refuse to be a stepping-stone in that way....but it IS interesting that Mr. Queens responded the way he did......so he obviously admits to being biased against (or maybe just having a preference.....WOW)"light-skinned"/bi-racial women....VERY INTERESTING. Then maybe it shouldn't bother him that much when many of those same women HE DOESN'T want find love elsewhere.

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  24.   Andy says:
    Posted: 07 Oct 08

    Who cares? Everyone will be a shade of brown in a few hundred years and all this talk will be redundant. Marry who you like and go for it. It's your life and it's for life.

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  25. Posted: 06 Oct 08

    Good thing, Mr. Laurelton has only ONE opinion and has only ONE life to live and that is his own...... lol...lol...

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  26.   1rockgodess says:
    Posted: 06 Oct 08

    I tot we were in this room to give concrete reasons on why "some" b/w are into w/m. Whats this craze about sell out, animousity, ingenuity, nazi? :( I f you've got problems with social issues such as this one why dont you sort yourself out rather go about causing the frictions for the lovers. To be understood you must first understand others, I mean I've been reading the comments for a while now and I decided to pop in a thing or two. first of all this is suppose to be an interacial dating site and this is gradually turning into a war of the sexas cum races or whatever is suppose to actually describe this menace of ugly emotions. The thing is if this site pisses you off so much why dont you back your bags because if you've never heard of it, hurray!!! good news there's a word called "EXIT" do exit in peace and stop causing un-necessary havoc here. calling names, using insults, rude language and down talking people that alone speaks about how you see yourself... :( If I were seeking a guy to date whether black/white with such attitude thats a definite noooo for me... terrible outlook on the world I must say. I'm a black girl who lives in d u.k, there's not much of interracial dates going on in here but like I said in some other chat blog in here I'm open to anybody so long as there's a special feeling for that person. Truth be told I'm greatly appaulled by the inane and witless remarks I've heard so far. To b/w please I urge you to do what you want cause there's one life and you gotta live it right not to hate yourself in the long run and some people have to understand that you cannot be of the same race blk wht mxd red blu or whatever you call it. Start living in reality is all I have to say to this so-called humans who live in this reverie of purely white r/ships or purely blk r/ship and to those who say they dont like or want black women PLEASE THE TITLE OF THE BLOG SAID "SOME!" black women so those who want to die in the white or black kingdom without experimenting suit yourself. By the way didnt step in to criticize a soul just trying to push some sanity in here and if you think there's really much wrong with this be warnedd there's venom and much horrifying racial statements you dont want to hear.

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  27.   Member says:
    Posted: 05 Oct 08

    For your information. All my girlfriends have been "dark skin". I resent that biracial statement. Maybe white men would be better off dating white women instead of "putting them down." They always talk about black men with white women. They never have anything harsh to say about white men dating black women and "putting white women down". It is amazing how much restraint white women have on "putting down" white men. Yet black women verbally attack black men everyday. Real pathetic.

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  28.   Natanya says:
    Posted: 05 Oct 08

    Tampa_Chris It may be better for the biracial girls to date black men. Black men treat those types of women like goddesses....

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  29.   Tampa_Chris says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 08

    "That whole dynamic would be another long story. I wonder if white guys on the board with a biracial daughter would let their daughter date a black man? If you answer, be honest, and do not bullshit." Of course I wouldn't care. If I did then I'd be a hypocrite. When I have a daughter, biracial or not, her happiness is most important. As long as the guy treats her with the dignity and respect she deserves then you can be whatever color under the sun. And everyone keeps summin' up all white men as the same. It makes all the good points brought up by all you catz blurred by naive opinion. Based off a seemingly insecure feeling of strong black women realizing that the world is changing and there really are GOOD STRONG MEN out there don't have to be black. I mean, its kind of funny to me that there's black men, especially in relationships, on an interracial dating site hatin' on open-minded sistas that are allllll over the united states and will continue on doing what they choose. Thats why they're STRONG BLACK WOMEN. Not because they need a black man, but because they realize A STRONG MAN. And it might hurt some ego's, but tons of sistas I talk to in the clubs or where ever the convo comes up admit to really wondering whats its like with a white boy. OH NO, there might be an epidemic coming!!! The sky shall fall. The plagues may come in full force!! haha. Keep doin what y'all do ladies. You can always come hang out wit me.

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  30. Posted: 03 Oct 08

    ok....Kudos, Mr. Queens for addressing my post...(a little to late since you still chose to just label me a sellout and say I have my head in the sand but oh well). I am glad you saw some of the same things I saw in Something New. I thought it was pointless for Sanaa's character to flip-flop the way she did....if I was Simon I would have told her to kick rocks...LOL. My head is not in the sand, dear man...AND have seen the light and it happens to reflect all the colors of the rainbow for me....I love you just as I love any man.....hail, any person that breathes and knows that they have a place in the world and take a stand in it......you continue to have my respect.. But my heart may happen to belong to a man that may not share your skin color but certainly will have your passion; this is why I would be with him ....never stop having that, man....it keeps you young at heart and alive. Peace and Blessings (as always) tatted2death

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  31. Posted: 03 Oct 08

    Clearly Mr. Queens can stand the smell of his own shit when it's thrown back in his face and hates when he can't silence a strong woman of color (judging from the way he fell back so easily on the "sellout" label rather than address me directly on the points I DID make). ***for the record, I TRIED to treat you like an intelligent human being on this board everytime but since you are resorting to directly calling a sellout for no good reason (you didn't give one so their for I think the only one might be because I challenge a black man to think beyond his comfort zone....Is that what makes me a sellout?????Rhetorical.....DON'T answer....I know you will.....LMAO)..I have no other choice but to ignore you from this point on.....I wish you all the best in whatever personal endeavors you might venture to acheive***** I love to be me and no one can tell me how to best to that. If sellout means that I don't "BUY IN" to anyone else's perception of me than HAIL TO THE YEAH I LOVE being a "sellout". Chew on that. Peace and Blessings tatted2death

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  32.   Member says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 08

    Dear Tatted I just read your previous post. You said this "You really ought not say what I can comment on seeing as how you are repeatedly “speaking for the white man” in saying…. “In the real world a white man will date all other races of women before he dates a black woman.”….. So YOU know every white man that has ever dated a black woman????….YOU SERIOUSLY NEED TO GET REAL if that is truly what you believe. What world are YOU living in, Mr. Queens, since you obviously seem to give more than a “DAYUM” about who black “sellout” women are dating??" Let me say it again since I was not CLEAR ENOUGH. White men date black women LAST, they would rather date a white woman, Asian, Latin and then a black woman. That is REALITY, now you talk about exceptions to the rule. That is just that "EXCEPTIONS" to the rule. You also said this "I have seen “Something New” and again just because the couple was interracial didn’t make it ALL about that……if you can take off your “color” glasses for a minute you can see that the story does have some underlying themes that have absolutely nothing to do with race as well. There WAS a point to making the Simon’s character “blue-collar”….again it really didn’t have anything to do with race. (I know this because I have personally corresponded with the writer, thank you…LOL)." Something New, do not let me get started about that. The White boy was a landscaper with not dirt under his fingernails and no dirt in his "wavy blonde hair". Then I think he lived on the "outskirts of Mexico". Black women will not live in a dirty road off Mexico in a White Boy's Old Wrangler Jeep. I took my "color" glasses off and I actually thought the White guy in " Something New" was a good dude. It was Sanaa Lathan characer who was confused, messing with black men and then running back to the white boy. You said this “Since I live in the black community I have not seen some mass exodus of black women to white men. White men rarely venture in the black community where black men are.” Mr. Queens….this really is just ANOTHER thinly veiled threat…come on, you are only MAKING YOURSELF LOOK BAD (NOT ALL BLACK MEN) when you make statements like that." How is that a threat????????? because I said the truth that I rarely see White guys in my neighborhood. I am telling the truth, I do not threaten anybody. I live in Laurelton Queens near Springfield Gardens. Go research it and see the demographics of the area. You said this "I love real men….PERIOD. And I certainly can have respect for a man that can express himself (even against popular belief). But the insults are what will continue to get your views unheard, twisted, forgotten about, etc…." Man listen you need a real black man like me to lay it down on you so you can see the light. I like intelligent women and you are that. You just simply like to put your head in the sand when it comes to race and life. Most black women are like that and I accept that. That is all I can say

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  33.   Member says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 08

    Clearly Tatted likes being a sellout black girl. Mr Realman made some valid points even though there was some "theatrics" involved. Black women dating outside their race is "the breakdown" of the black community. Just like if a black woman gets "ill" or suffers from illnesses like diabetes and other "problems" it does affect the black community. Some people on this board have this idea that "love" solves all problems. That is quite an idealistic notion but that is not always the case. As for the white employer thing, that is a double edge sword. College educated black people have a less than one percent unemployment rate. Black women in particular with a college degree like myself, on a whole, have a 99 percent employment rate. I never believed in the idea "that the white man holds me back" deal. Black women have a right to date outside their race. The problem is they do it for the "wrong reasons" to spite black men. Until you admit that then you will always have a problem. Personally I do not understand the hostility of sellout black women. Even if you are with a white man and have children with him. Those kids "are black", that is the bottom line. My father's best friend is white and married to a black women. I have been friends with his biracial daughter and son my whole life. I am 30 years she is 30 and her brother is 25. My father's White best friend "George" is cool. The problem is he can' come to terms with his biracial daughter dating a black man unless it " was me". Since he known me since I was a baby. That whole dynamic would be another long story. I wonder if white guys on the board with a biracial daughter would let their daughter date a black man? If you answer, be honest, and do not bullshit.

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  34. Posted: 03 Oct 08

    Mr. RealMan (if you are NOT truly "gone"....LOL) I think your first paragraph made some sense, but allow me to play devil's advocate here (pun intended....loving the "blue-eye devil"....LOL). Let me ask you this....can you draw any correlation to who a black woman dates to the economic breakdown of ANY race?? Can you honestly say that if a black woman decides not to date you that you may not be able to eat tomorrow or have a place to live???. My point is that true discrimination (the kind that anyone could ever dream of changing) can really only be defined by the impact it has on a community as a whole. The systematic and biased hiring practices of the white employer you referenced can not really be compared with a woman's right to say she won't date what she doesn't like. Just like a man who might say he doesn't date "big" women.....That is his preference and while it may limit him it has little effect on the "plight of the big woman" (if there is any.....LOL). Like you said for every black woman who is not dating black men there are plenty more that are....WE need to stick with that sort of thinking across the board and NOT take is so personal just because one person (or a thousand....there are too many people in the world for this shyt) says that would rather not date you.....WHATEVER THEIR REASONS ARE>>>>>>>WHO GIVES A DAYUM..... Peace and Blessings tatted2death

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  35. Posted: 03 Oct 08

    Mr. Queens.... You really ought not say what I can comment on seeing as how you are repeatedly "speaking for the white man" in saying.... "In the real world a white man will date all other races of women before he dates a black woman."..... So YOU know every white man that has ever dated a black woman????....YOU SERIOUSLY NEED TO GET REAL if that is truly what you believe. What world are YOU living in, Mr. Queens, since you obviously seem to give more than a "DAYUM" about who black "sellout" women are dating?? You are right, my little opinion on a movie that I will probably never see matters not....but I can express what I feel about it nonetheless (I have friends who have seen it and the trailers sum it up rather well actually....so guess what....I CAN formulate an opinion on it....you'd be surprised at how many PAID critics actually never really see the movies they review). I have seen "Something New" and again just because the couple was interracial didn't make it ALL about that......if you can take off your "color" glasses for a minute you can see that the story does have some underlying themes that have absolutely nothing to do with race as well. There WAS a point to making the Simon's character "blue-collar"....again it really didn't have anything to do with race. (I know this because I have personally corresponded with the writer, thank you...LOL). "Since I live in the black community I have not seen some mass exodus of black women to white men. White men rarely venture in the black community where black men are." Mr. Queens....this really is just ANOTHER thinly veiled threat...come on, you are only MAKING YOURSELF LOOK BAD (NOT ALL BLACK MEN) when you make statements like that. I don't dismiss everything you say simply because you have obviously no authority to label all black women who date white men as "sellouts" (yeah you try and say some "might" not be....but your view it still pretty narrow). And I don't think ignoring you will "make you go away" either. The valid points I have seen you express are enough to let me know that you have a brain and eventually you will grow tired....just as anyone else would. And anyone that is feeling like they are "wasting" their time here, PROBABLY IS. I love real men....PERIOD. And I certainly can have respect for a man that can express himself (even against popular belief). But the insults are what will continue to get your views unheard, twisted, forgotten about, etc.... Peace and Blessings tatted2death

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  36.   Member says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 08

    Most of you all would call it discrimination or racist if a white employer didn't hire blacks because he preferred only whites. It amazes me how some black women on here would say they only date white men. Isn't that discrimination and racist too??? Whatever you wanna call it, who cares? I can guarantee you that black men are not losing any sleep over women who don't date them. Do you realize how many women out there love Black men? MANY!!! So therefore, all you women that only date white guys, it's no lost to the Black Man; you are irrelevant... remember that. To all the women who love Black men, love and respect to you. As far as the rest of you all, go stand in the corner and face the wall... Enough time wasted here; I'm out. Ya boy, MrRealMan

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  37.   BronzeEra71 says:
    Posted: 03 Oct 08

    I only semi-qualify as a black woman -- being half & half and never having met my black father. However, if the woman in the photo can be called black, then I certainly can. I want to bring a new reason into the mix, because I'm curious whether this comes into other people's rationales for deciding whom to date: I HATE being stereotyped!!! I find it supremely annoying that many people assume that I date only black men, just as a redhead would resent it if people expected her to date only redheaded men... In my (admittedly imperfect) mind, it's right in there with people thinking I should wear dark, bold patterns and large gold jewelry. Coming from a family of very stubbornly independent-minded Scots-Irish, I have a strong resistance to doing what people tell me I'm 'supposed' to do. This most definitely restricts my options, and I've quite possibly missed out on some wonderful men. But I just can't make myself fit into that damn box. Incidentally, after years of refusing to look at black men, I did fall in love with and date a black man for a while, and the day-to-day black culture in our city (Portland, OR) just turned out to be too uncomfortable and foreign for me (that includes the man himself). So now I have a preference for white men both because we're culturally compatible and to confound people's narrow stereotyped expectations.

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  38.   Tampa_Chris says:
    Posted: 29 Sep 08

    The Bronx Tale was the most on-point movie for showing the real trials and tribulations of dating outside your race. Something New was really good but not great, buuuuuut it did have my wife in it so I liked it more. Guess Who was more of the quirky light-hearted version that I liked but didn't agree with how "easy" it made that whole situation feel. The original was better. I used to think Tyler Perry was completely bias, but he's had his moments where I was like "oookay Tyler, I see you"

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  39.   Member says:
    Posted: 29 Sep 08

    Dear Tatted Like "you said", you never saw the movie. Therefore your opinion on it would not make sense just like your post. The movie is not totally about race, but race plays a "key factor" in the movie. I saw some sellout black women on this board rip into "DJTEEL". They called him a "nazi" and other "things" not worth mentioning. Simply because he said he "could not date" a black woman because they like R&B and Rap music. A white man that does not like R&B and dating a black woman is strange in itself but I digress. Samuel L Jackson's character has friends of difference races and still felt the same way he did about interracial dating. The White guy in the movie had a friend say "Yea I need me a black girl too" in a derogatory manner. I am aware it is an Hollywood movie, I am also aware when "Something New" came out they praised it as the "best interracial movie made". Considering the White man in the movie was a landscaper that has no dirt under his finger nails. I guess Hollywood could bring themselves to have Sanaa Lathan's character have a man with the same level of education and career as her. That is another long story in itself. As for this threat as "being a warning" to sellout black women. That is all hype to make black men look bad again. In the real world nobody gives a shit about who you date. In the real world a white man will date all other races of women before he dates a black woman. Since I live in the black community I have not seen some mass exodus of black women to white men. White men rarely venture in the black community where black men are. The movie Lakeview Terrace has realistic moments but in the end the movie goes Hollywood. If you did not see the movie, you cannot formulate an opinion.

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  40. Posted: 29 Sep 08

    oh wow...when did every "Hollywood" movie that comes out suddenly become a documentary????. I have yet to see Lakeview Terrace....but from my understanding race doesn't really have that much to do with race, per se (yes there is an interracial couple in it and a black man....the relevance of those facts is questionable at best.) I am sure that race is NOT inconsequential in the movie but certainly that is done purely for sensationalism. The core plot, if there really is any, probably hinges more on universal "thiller" aspects rather than making it totally about race....but if I am wrong then I STILL WIN because I probably won't waste my time and/or money to see the piece of tripe..LOL. I am NOT that "thirsty" to see bw/wm relationships on the silver screen....(for the record....I did NOT think "Something New" was the greatest thing either...LOL) I have heard some others speak of the movie the same way; saying "That should be a warning to all black ("sellout"....LOL)women that think they can get away with dating a white boy"..... I find these sort of scare tactics hilarious.....why would a hollywood movie change what my decision to date "inclusively"????(you know that sort of thinking is why so many people believe black men are mostly criminal-minded....PEOPLE NEED TO STOP BUYING THE MEDIA HYPE>>>>PERIOD!!!). I guess I might just be part of that "white-out" club, Beauty.....LOL Peace tatted2death

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  41.   churchgirl says:
    Posted: 29 Sep 08

    With me its just my preference. I like variety. I like my crayola box to be different from anyone else's lol There is nothing wrong with the black man at all. Some have awesome qualities. But its just my preference. Actually this website says it all for me. "its ok to color outside the lines. Its funny to me also because I am a prechool teacher.

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  42.   Member says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 08

    Here we go The sellout black women from the other "forums" making comments about me because I am made a compliment to a black woman on this board. The audacity of these women really amazes me. For the record I post on Sara Board and sometimes she post my commentary. This board does not practice censorship like you sellout black women like to do on your boards. I can never understand the anger you have for black men when you had your legs up in the air for us before you met a white man. You wasn't saying this when you moaning and bending over for us lol. When your relationships fall apart with black men because of "your" bad decisions now you kick sand at us and pretend you always wanted to be a white man. I am aware of the exceptions, the black women that said they "always" date white men all along. Usually those black women that only dated white men, had "thick glasses, braces, and self-hate issues. I want you to be happy with a white man, but do not put black men down because your pathetic. 80 percent of those sellout black women boards talk about us anyway! They may mention white men in the context of hating on us lol. Simply amazing New Post on Lakeview Terrace the movie review. Finally a movie that gives you the black man's perspective on sellout black women. "Something New" was a joke. These sellout black women think it is black men in the "lower socio economic scale" that think they are a sellout. There is many professional and affluent black men that hate it to. I am gone http://mrlaureltonqueens.blogspot.com/

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  43.   Member says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 08

    I just want to send a shout out to all the women who love Black men. For the rest of you women, you can get the boot; you're no good for a Black man anyway. Love peace and happiness to all the women who love Black men; you are the best.... Ya boy, MrRealMan.

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  44.   jenny says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 08

    Mr. Queens makes me crave vanilla even more ;p

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  45.   jenny says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 08

    PLEASE IGNORE Mr. Queens! HE is on all the interracial boards for bw and wm and harassing them. CW(black women deserve better) and Evia's(bw interracial blog) have all banned him and so now he's here. I wonder how many bm/ww boards he's harassing.lol, let me guess... none.lol!GEEZ, WHY DO BLACK MEN THINK THAT ONLY THEY ARE ENTITLED TO SOME swirl love?LMAO;)

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  46.   jenny says:
    Posted: 28 Sep 08

    Just wanted to say that the black men who are on this board complaining like little girls should go elsewhere to do that! I'm realy not buying into the 'woe is de black man' sob story, when the truth is that bm hurt and degrade bw more than the other way around.Has anyone ever stoped to think why a bm would even be on this message board? Especially when there are more bm with ww than bw with wm. Sureley they could have found a forum about bm/ww.lol

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  47.   dcnot420 says:
    Posted: 25 Sep 08

    also the staska chick on here who is the 2nd post reiterates my fetish claim she said she fantasized about white men.in my ex:i was trying to show how someone can see someone of another culture/race and then from that day on seem to see more of the same people of that culture/race and there fetish can then go from a full on fetish to a so called full on preference.that is all a prefernece really is a fetish that is full blown.people on here that get mad about the word fetish are getting mad because they have always associated the word fetish with something bad.and they dont want themselves labeled as a fetishist when they really are.i should of wrote my ex better,because it sounds horrible after i read what i had wrote.

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  48.   dcnot420 says:
    Posted: 25 Sep 08

    i meant to say somewhere in there that he says fuck it i only want to date /find myself attracted to indian women.that is where his fetish goes into full on preference.im going to try to get on a better computer cause this one is fucking up.and i hate typing on slow computers.

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  49.   dcnot420 says:
    Posted: 25 Sep 08

    my best ex: of how a fetish goes into a straight on preference is this.one day a white guy is watching tv.on tv there is a hot ass indian girl.he has seen indian girls before but never that hot.from that day on he in the back of his mind says i really want a indian girl(that is the beginning of the fetish,also a lot of people that say they prefer or only date have never dated what they say they prefer or only date in the first place).from that day on he starts to find himself strongly attracted to indian girls(even though all races have attractive people).all he sees nowadays is fine ass indian women.which builds upon his fetish.his fetish now has just went from a fetish to a full on preference.i would of typed this example better but my computer is fucked up so im to lazy to wait for how slow it is going.

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  50.   dcnot420 says:
    Posted: 23 Sep 08

    dont get that confused either you got girls who wont tell either but when it gets looked at by others they make the girl seem more exploited then they would a male.

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